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New York City: converting people into assholes since… who the hell even knows
Too bad hideous isn’t my type or we’d be a great match
Sorry to hear about your breakup… glad that piece of shit’s out of your life
I stepped in dog shit and thought of you
Just because you have a gay friend doesn’t mean I want to date him
I was cleaning the cat box and thought of you
You have the hygiene of a straight man
Just because we’ve been dating a while doesn’t give you permission to be a fat fuck
And to think… I wanted children with that face
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